Thursday, April 03, 2003

Blah, Blog, Blah!

Ok, so I have been remiss in posting. I could apologize and say I’m sorry, but I’m not. I have not really had anything to say of late. I don’t really want to make this blog just a aily detailed description of my lackluster life, so I have remained silent.

Do I have something to say now? No, not really. Well, not anything of importance anyway. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking—as I am apt to do—and since I have an hour commute in both the morning and the evening I have the time to do so.

I suppose in some way I like the definite just as much as I like the indefinite. (my dichotomy is showing again) I have become quite frustrated with myself for never being able to come to any concrete conclusions. I hate to say it but at this point in my life, I’m rather wishy-washy and apathetic about a lot of things. You have no idea how this upsets me. I have never been a nebulous kind of person. I have always known what I believe and acted accordingly. The one thing I do know is that I don’t know much of anything anymore.

Now, onto details of my lackluster life.

Hubby’s grandfather has been in the hospital and is quite seriously ill. We have been spending a lot of time up there with him as he is in a lot of pain and the hospital he is in is seriously lacking in patient advocacy.

My job is going well. This week has been stressful but it’s the beginning of event season so things are always hectic at this time. I really miss designing and the creativity of it. At the end of the day I now have papers I have shuffled around. I miss having a tangible object that I conceptualized and saw through to fruition. I do not miss the stress that went with it.

Hubby has started a new schedule. He will be working 10:30am to 7:00pm. Hopefully this will give us the normalcy we have been in need of. I don’t know how much longer we could have handled his old schedule. We never got to see each other and as for quality time together... not much at all.


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