Tuesday, August 20, 2002

Well. My ultrasound is tonight. I am nervous--very nervous. I have not been able to keep my mind on anything for more than five minutes at a time all day long. It doesn't help that all the networks and thus the network printers at work have been down since like 9 this morning and therefore we can't get much work done. I have not much to occupy my mind except for the obvious. I am sure it is nothing. I just keep thinking over and over again about all the things that could go wrong. Obviously I am not sleeping well. I have twice dreamed about my own funeral. Let me tell you--not a good dream to have. I toss and turn and wake up like five times each night. The only night I slept all the way through was when I had a glass of wine and took a sleeping pill. It was glorious. You never really know how important sleep is until you can't get it. Anyway.... it's 3:51 p.m.; two hours, twenty-four minutes and counting.


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